Before I got the news, I would have
never thought that something so horrific would happen to me. You never really
think about hearing bad news but when you hear it, unfortunately it hits you
like a ton of bricks. When I was told that my son was dead, I dropped to
the ground and I began to weep. I knew that my son could die in the war, but I never expected it to be my beloved son. Losing loved ones is a part of life sooner or later but honestly no one
should ever have to endure it. Losing a son is one of the hardest experiences that I have ever had to endure.
I thought back about all of the
wonderful memories I had with my son and I began to weep harder. All of the
memories and the memories to come were stolen from me within seconds. Thinking
about all of the memories, I began to ask myself if I had taken life with my son
for granted. I began to wonder if my son truly knew that I loved him with every
fiber of my being, because I truly did love him with everything in me. I would
do absolutely anything for my son. I would die for my son and I hope that he
knew that before he was gone. I truly hope that my son knew that I
cherished and loved every single moment that I got with him. Nothing was
greater than the time that I had with my son. All I could think about was why
this had to happen to me. I don’t understand why my son had to be taken from
me. I couldn’t help but wonder if this was karma catching up to me. Was all of this karma punishing me for something that I had
done? I couldn’t imagine what I had done so bad that I would have to lose my
son over it.
Why am I even alive if I don’t have
my beloved son? My son was my world and my everything. Oh, what I would do to
get one more chance to tell my son that I love him so much and that I was proud
of everything that he had accomplished. My son was a wonderful warrior and he knew everything there was to know about weapons, and I was so proud of that. Surely my son knew but I have no way of
letting him know that he was my everything. I don’t really know what there is
to do now that my son is gone.
I knew exactly what I was going to
do. I knew that I was going to take my life. My life was nothing without my
son. He made life worth living. Tears began to roll down my eyes because I know
what I was going to do. I got a spear that was big enough to do the deed. I had
to do this myself. I couldn’t let anyone else to this. I knew that I had to end
my suffering and the devastation on my own. Without hesitation I pierced the
spear into my heart. Nothing was left of me without my son so this too had to
be done.
Bibliography: Narayan, R.J. (1978). The Mahabharata
Author's Note- I decided to write my story from the way that Drona was feeling. I
think that during any time of sorrow anyone needs to have a voice and needs to
be heard. The best way to grieve is to talk about feelings and let others know
what is going on during rough and emotional times. The real tragedy of the
story was that Drona's son was actually not dead. In fact, the death of
Aswatthaman was a trick by the Pandavas. They had to do this to stop Drona's
fighting. The Pandavas wanted to put an end to Drona because he could fight
until there wasn’t anyone left in the their army. The trick ended up being that Bhima smashed the skull of an elephant which was also named Aswatthaman and Bhima ended up calling out that he had killed Aswatthaman to where Drona could hear. I really went overboard on how depressed
Drona was feeling because I wanted to show how this story is more of a double
tragedy since he took his life because of trickery. The more I elaborated
with Drona’s thoughts within the story, the more it gave an understanding why
someone could understand why Drona would even think of taking his own life. In
the original story, Dhrishtadyumna ended up cutting off Drona's head freeing
him from his humiliation that his father faced years ago. In my story, I wanted him to feel like taking his own
life was something he had to do for inner peace and closure, if there was
any to come from such a terrible double tragedy.
Kelsey,
ReplyDeleteOverall, I found your story to be very easy to read. I could easily envision that Drona would go through all of those feelings upon learning about the death of their child. Again, good job making this so believable. One small grammatical error I found was that I believe that you’re missing a comma after the ‘it’ in this sentence: You never really think about hearing bad news but when you hear it unfortunately it hits you like a ton of bricks.
I think you did well emphasizing the how Drona must have felt losing a son! I feel like I would also continue to go over in my head all of the memories and love that I had for my child. The use of repetition really helped that emphasis.
ReplyDeleteI noticed a few missing commas, a capitalization error with If (‘…help but wonder If God…’) and a couple repeat vocabulary close to one another. Other than that, great job!
Hey again Kelsey!
ReplyDeleteI thought this story was very intense and heartfelt. To me, it seemed like a pretty valid assumption of how a father would feel if their son had died. You did a great job describing his painful thoughts and contemplation of suicide. I thought it was a good addition to the story because it made it seem so emotional.
Hello Kelsey!
ReplyDeleteYour story was fun and easy to read. I could imagine Drona going through all those emotions upon learning about his son's death. You did a great job at describing his feelings.
You're missing commas at a lot of places. Here are the ones that I thought were grammatically incorrect.
In the first sentence, I think there should be a comma after news. "Before I got the news,I would have.."
Third sentence - "When I was told that my son was dead, I dropped.."
In the Author's Note - the sentence beginning with "I couldn't imagine," I think you meant to say THOUGHT THAT HE HAD LOST HIS SON instead of "thought that the had lost his son."
Other than a few errors, your story has great content and it was definitely fun to read!